this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
