At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
