I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
