all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
