i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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