Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry danceinatriangle hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(954): View more from Florida

the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.

Fav 24 1010 1680
share tweet
(410): View more from Maryland

She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.

Fav 9 799 3064
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(813): View more from Florida

He had one of those small greek statue penises

Fav 33 1104 5689
share tweet
(303): View more from Colorado

All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs

Fav 43 5560 1584
share tweet
(952): View more from Minnesota

Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.

Fav 15 1225 4433
share tweet
(913): View more from Kansas

I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.

Fav 26 926 4374
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(519): View more from Ontario

you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.

Fav 7 3786 991
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(419): View more from Ohio

Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.

Fav 1 473 416
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(202): View more from Washington, DC

I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.

Fav 1 70 17
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT