Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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