you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize