windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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