She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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