He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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