Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
