Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
