I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
