Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
