It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Randomize
