So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Randomize
