I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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