apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
