The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
