wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
