Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
