I just pynch a tree in the face
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
