i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I can't turn off my feet"
This is my gift to your gina
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
