Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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