Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
