My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
So many bounce houses so little time
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
