Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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