the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize