i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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