remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
