so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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