i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
