I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
