In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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