The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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