OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
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