you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize