haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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