dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
