If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
