nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
