also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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