the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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