If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
