so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
