every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize