LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
