i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
