whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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